A student who went viral after tearing out her own eyeballs while high on crystal meth has revealed she has “no regrets” after recently being fired from her job.
Kaylee Muthart, from Anderson, South Carolina, was just 20 years old when she experienced a severe psychotic episode in 2018 while under the influence of methamphetamine.
After starting with marijuana in high school, Kaylee progressed to smoking and then injecting meth. When her mother eventually convinced her to go to rehab and get clean, Muthart sought one final high before quitting.
Terrifyingly, the drug made her believe that “everyone would die if I didn’t tear out my eyes immediately.”
“I remember thinking that someone had to sacrifice something important to fix the world, and that person was me,” she told South West News Service via the Daily Mail. “I got on my hands and knees, pounding the ground and praying, ‘Why me? Why do I have to do this?’”
She went on to explain: “I pushed my thumb, pointer, and middle finger into each eye. I gripped each eyeball, twisted, and pulled until each eye came out of the socket—it felt like a massive struggle, the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.” She said a church pastor later found her screaming, “I want to see the light.”
“He later said that when he found me, I was holding my eyeballs in my hands. I had crushed them, although they were somehow still attached,” Muthart explained.
The horrific ordeal left Kaylee permanently blind. However, she managed to overcome her drug addiction and has since worked to rebuild her life. Part of that journey included getting a job washing dishes at a local restaurant while continuing her education.
In a recent update, it was revealed she has since been fired from that position, though Kaylee says she has “no regrets” about how it happened.
Speaking to the Mirror, she explained she lost her job because she was taking food from the restaurant kitchen to feed a hungry cat and her eight kittens.
The restaurant owner asked her to stop taking the food, which ultimately led to her dismissal when she refused.
“I am feeling positive after the loss of my last job,” Kaylee said.
“Being fired never feels good, but I can walk away knowing that I did what I believed in my heart was right.
“I could not, in good conscience, leave every night knowing there was a kitty waiting to be fed. So I gave it my meal from my shift and even ordered extra specifically for the cat.”
She admitted it was “hard on her” to lose the ability to support herself, adding: “I wouldn’t have been able to walk away knowing I didn’t do what I felt was right.
“So as a result, I stay positive every day of my life because I am at peace, knowing I live without regretting my choice.”
Beyond losing her job, Kaylee also shared that she now wears prosthetic eyeballs, saying she wanted to “appear more normal to the outside world.”
“Of course, there are times when I get really upset about my situation, especially on nights when I can’t sleep,” she said. “But honestly, I’m happier now than I was before all this happened. I would rather be blind than dependent on drugs.”
